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[chauffeuring]

open post. anything welcome. i like all things, i am trash.

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[chauffeuring]

[ upon hearing those words from gladio, ignis can't help but close his eyes and hold his breath. hearing them spoken out loud just cements everything into place, that no matter what he does or how much he pretends everything is normal, nothing will truly be the same. the gaping hole left behind by noctis will never go away or stop hurting. normally people would grieve and in time come to accept their loss as they spend time fondly remembering their loved one. ignis knows better though. this will never get easier because it's not just a friend they've lost. he'd been just about raised to look after noctis and without him what else was there? what would he even do? there's no backup plan for when the center of your world falls apart.

ignis lets his breath out, ignoring how shaky it is as he blinks back tears. crying won't fix anything or solve any problems; shedding tears won't bring back the dead and ignis can't help but despise how his body betrays him as the corners of his vision begin to blur. he even reaches out to snag gladio's wrist with one hand, taking the smallest piece of solace he can in that simple touch.] Then what's the point?

[protecting]

❰ iggy's shaking. at least his breath is, and gladio may have been shaking all this time but this is different. ignis, he's-... well, obviously not impenetrable, but some part of gladio used to think he was.

it's as if all this time, he expected iggy to have some kind of logical rationale for why things aren't entirely fucked. but he doesn't, and the weight of that fact bears down hard on gladio's shoulders. it's heavy, too heavy.

the instant the hand closes around his wrist, gladio's knees drop out from under him, forehead sliding off ignis's shoulder and down most of his chest. and then he's on a knee, almost as if he's taking some sort of oath instead of simply falling apart. his other hand's found the one wrapped around his wrist and that's where his forehead rests now, on the only contact left between them. it's a lifeline he doesn't deserve. ❱

I should've - ❰ he chokes, sucking in a hitched breath. his own eyes are swimming now, the carpet blurring in the moment before he closes them altogether. ❱ I-, I did this. All I had to do was - ❰ was protect the prince. he had one job. ❱

[chauffeuring]

[ there are no answers for what has happened, nor are there answers for what they should be doing next and that realization takes ignis' breath away all over again. everything they have done up until now had a purpose and now there was nothing to look towards but a chasm of uncertainty. there is no longer a set direction for them to follow.

ignis snaps out of his fugue a little as he feels gladio sinking to one knee. it's not difficult to see the thought process and emotions that gladiolus is going through. to some degree they all feel it, but ignis knows on some level that the amicitia family had their own crosses to bear and that the death of the crown prince would be something to haunt gladio for decades. ignis quickly makes a decision, trying to ignore his own crippling pain in order to help another. he doesn't have any hope for the future or plans to make for them to adhere to, but ignis knows that at least right now he can try to make some kind of a difference.

otherwise what else is there? what is the point of any of this? what is the point to him?

ignis crouches down as he does his best to hold his own emotions in check. gladio needs him, he needs someone and ignis reaches out to place his free hand on the back of the other's neck.] You did not do this. You didn't.